When you are overwhelmed by mess it’s easy to slip into one of two modes: Paralysis or Procrastination. But how do you beat paralysis and procrastination to declutter your home?
You want to start tidying, but you just don’t know where to start. Or you start but end up switching from task to task and never actually getting anything done.
“I have today to clean for the first time in ages. I don’t even know what to tackle first. I will start something then walk to another room to put it away only to find something there to tackle. I’ve never felt so overwhelmed in my life. Where do I start first?”
I found this comment on a social post so relatable.
When you are overwhelmed by mess a lack of will to deal with it is rarely the problem.
The problem really lies in having clear, actionable steps that you know are going to lead to your desired outcome.
This is particularly problematic for those of us with ADHD brains. We can see the end goal. A tidy house. But the steps to get there are so many, so jumbled or so insignificant that we just can’t see how to get there.
And if we can’t see a clear path we will get lost or take a wrong turn on the way.
So you can find yourself with a mountain of stuff to do, but instead of doing it, you are zoned out on the couch, scrolling TikTok or just hiding under the covers.
(You may also like The Best Decluttering Questions to Ask to Overcome Overwhelm)
Having too much to do is overwhelming and can paralyse us into not doing anything at all.
I experienced this in a big way when I was pregnant with my daughter. We were due to be moving soon. Our lovely flat, though large, was on the top floor of a walk-up building. Not ideal with a small child.
The plan was to buy a house in a green and family-friendly neighbourhood.
So this was the perfect opportunity to declutter old furniture we had inherited and clutter we had amassed and knew we wouldn’t need any more. And that was my plan.
But although I wanted to go through this stuff in the evenings and at weekends, it just wasn’t happening.
I’d find myself doing anything but. Scrolling property listings. Researching baby buggies. Pulling out a box to sort and then realising an hour later that all I’d done is look through old photos and search the profiles of old school friends on Facebook.
So why, even something is important, do we find ourselves so paralysed or distracted that we can’t get it done?
“Your brain doesn’t just see a to-do list; it sees a threat. It sees the threat of scarcity: not enough time, not enough energy, not enough magical ability to fit everything into twenty-four hours. Or it sees the threat of failing, the threat of disappointing others, the threat of feeling incapable.”
– Ellen Hendriksen, PhD
This freeze response is a common symptom of ADHD. Paralysis comes from other sources too, including depression, anxiety, fatigue or hormonal changes. Or simply the from the feeling of powerlessness when facing an enormous task.
Whatever your cause, you need some simple strategies to break out of the cycle and move forward.
Beat Paralysis and Avoid Procrastination
Prioritising and planning are executive function skills that ADHD brains struggle with, so you can easily end up so overwhelmed that you just can’t start at all.
Follow This Simple Method to Beat Paralysis and Avoid Procrastination:
Divide and Conquer
To break out of Overwhelm Paralysis you need two things:
- A task that is small enough not to be overwhelming
- A clearly defined end point. Again, to reduce overwhelm, but also to give you the dopamine reward of completion.
To overcome distraction you need:
- A clearly defined task
- A location you don’t need to leave
- A short enough time frame to maintain focus.
KC Davis demonstrates how this looks in practice in her “5 Things Tidying Method” which you can watch here:
You’ll see her cleaning a really messy kitchen and lounge by breaking it down by task:
- Trash
- Dishes
- Laundry
- Things with a place
- Things without a place
Breaking it down like this makes each task smaller, lets you complete them quickly, gives clarity on what to do, keeps you in one space and breaks down the time.
But What if You Have a Big Job? (like decluttering the whole house before a move)
That’s not a small task, it has multiple rooms and a long timeframe. And this can throw your brain into full on panic mode.
With a big task you need to break it down into smaller milestones. And if it is a job with a fixed deadline, you’ll need to give each milestone a deadline too.
Once you’ve broken your job down into smaller chunks you can use the tips above to tackle each task one at a time.
Make sure you track your progress too. I like to think of a fundraising progress bar. The church roof fund does not expect to get to their goal in one, big donation. Instead, lots of small ones eventually colour the bar till they reach their goal.
What if you still can’t get started?
Sometimes Setting Tasks Alone is not Enough. You may need external sources of motivation.
Here are some more ideas to beat procrastination and paralysis:
- Talk the task through with someone – A friend, family member or a coach.
- “Coach” yourself – What would you tell a friend to do?
- Accountability buddy – Share your goal and set a time to report back on your progress.
- Accountability post – Post your goal in a group, then report back on your progress.
- Motivational background – Put something that inspires on to watch or listen to. Youtube, a podcast or even energising music.
- Hire an expert. The fastest way to beat procrastination and paralysis is to get professional help.
Conclusion – Beat Paralysis and Avoid Procrastination
So if you are finding yourself in tidying overwhelm, and battling either paralysis or distraction, remember that first of all this does not make you a bad or incompetent person. Your brain is simply looking for ways to protect you from the threats you are facing.
Remember to:
- Look for ways to break the task down into smaller steps,
- track and celebrate each step as you complete it to reward yourself along the way,
- and look for external sources of support and motivation.
You may also like 12 Ways to Start Decluttering When You Are Feeling Overwhelmed.
